Loos House, Vienna

Standing stiffly and unapologetically on Saint Michael's Square, right across from the imperial Hofburg palace, Loos House is the architectural equivalent of showing up to a masquerade ball in a sharply tailored suit—no frills, no fuss, just pure modernist swagger. Designed by enfant terrible Adolf Loos between 1910 and 1912, the building sparked such fury in Emperor Franz Joseph, who had the misfortune of having to look at it from his palace windows, that he reportedly kept the curtains drawn for the rest of his life. Yes, really...

What sent the Emperor into such a rage? The minimalist upper façade. No Baroque baubles, no ornate curlicues—just smooth surfaces and unapologetic restraint. Locals nicknamed it "the house without eyebrows", since Loos dared to leave out the usual window cornices. The authorities only let construction proceed once he promised to stick ten bronze flower boxes on the front—like putting earrings on a sculpture just to calm the neighbors.

But don’t be fooled by the austerity here. Loos House isn’t just functional; it’s function dressed in finery. The ground floor is all gleaming Cipollino and Skyros marble, flanked by Tuscan columns that gently nod to nearby Saint Michael’s Church. And while you can’t roam freely inside—the building now houses a bank—you can visit the ground floor exhibition. The interior, lovingly restored, offers a teasing glimpse of what lies beyond, including a spectacular wooden staircase that’s strictly off-limits unless you’re making a large deposit.

Tip:
If you're still curious about Herr Loos, trade architectural awe for cocktail hour at the Loos American Bar, just six blocks east at No. 10 Kärntner Durchgang. It’s tiny, dark, and dripping with early 20th-century cool—exactly how Loos liked his design and, probably, his martinis, too... The place is open from noon to 4 am daily.